I want LSD.

LSD, you know Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds AKA Lysergic Acid Diethylamide. Has any one ever wanted a hallucinogenic purely because everything around them was boring to the point that you need drugs to stimulate your limbic system and over excite your dopaminergic neurons just so you can feel something slightly different and exciting.

And then a question presented itself in my mind: Is this how people get into drugs? Because they got really impossibly bored with their own lives? I wonder.
Sad times for humanity.

I was bored not because I had nothing to do, I had plenty to do, but nothing stimulated my interest any more. I had drawn a blank. Everything just seems so blah and tiresome- Anyway back to the point, so drugees of the world? Were you all just bored?

Hmmmm, maybe someday they will find a gene that says you predispositioned to be a drugee. What? There is a god gene or have you not heard? Keep up with your science.

Genes?

What if we were genetically predispositioned to become our parents? Like some of us are predisposition with heart disease? Or type II diabetes? Under the right circumstances, if we dont work to change our "lifestyle" you could turn into your parents.
What if the reason history keeps repeating itself was not a failure to learn but an inability to change? If history keeps repeating itself, does history then cease to exist? Does our past become our future, more or less?

Most of your life, every decision you ever made or didn't make every action that drove you to be something better, every action you took or decided not to take, everything you are, everything that made you into who you are was already planned out within you, in those double-helixed little segments, within every cell, was a blue print of who you were meant to be just like it contained a blue print of what your suppose to look like and how you're meant to function, and no matter how much you tried to be someone else, you just couldn’t, because your "hard wired" that way. All those little bits of double helixed DNA wrapped up- commanding a life form.

Nothing becomes humanity, we are not special, and we are not unique, were not like bloody little snowflakes. We are just different versions of our parents, like they were a different version of their parents, none of us are original; humanity is not original. Everything is just "a copy of a copy of a copy" within and insomniac's reality, sad really.

Then there are those geniuses, those guys are just a genetic mutation, they were never meant to happen. They say all genius is crazy, their right. History is proof, Pythagoras the mathematical genius created his own religion where beans were the devil, yep, normal edible beans. They say Michelangelo the great artist had autism, John Nash another mathematician and a noble prize winner had schizophrenia.
Seems to become great, you have to be a little dysfunctional and insane.

Confessions of an insomniac.

- Im still bitter and I hate them all. Fuck forgiveness and good grace and being the fucking better person. I HATE THEM. There I said it: I hate their fucking guts and I dont even bloody care if they all just DIE suddenly. A7SAN.

- Im dreading next year cause I think I'll fail. 

- You know when I told you I loved you, I think I was slightly delusional. I dont know why I said it- Plead temporary insanity. 

- I ate your last cookie when you werent looking.

- I hate your fucking guts.

- I say I dont care, I say it all the time. I say it to myself, to the walls, to the sky, I say I dont care I scream it to myself and to the world: I DONT CARE. In the hope that repeating the statement will make it true.

- I want to keep you forever. 

- For once Im afraid of showing someone who I am, Im afraid they wont like it and that I'll lose them.

- Some days I want to cry and I dont even know why.

- Today you touched my arm and I swear I recoiled with actual fear for no reason at all.

- I hate summer vacations.

WAIT, What?

WELCOME TO MY WORLD.

WELCOME TO MY REALITY.

Where no one cares and no one cares that no one cares. Everyone is just THAT selfish. 

Where nice people are the idiots, the idiots are the jokers, the jokers are the adored ones and the adored ones are the most despised. 

This is a world ruled by selfish, SELFISH bastards. Who will laugh at your tears and kick you when your down.

HI.

Your stay with us is going to cost you your sanity. 

Cash or Card? 

Xx

P.S; I love all you blogger peoples <3

I am Jacks pharyngeal reflex.

Im tired. Im sick and tired of everyone and their love lives, its spring time and everyones in love. Everyones hormones are shooting up sky high, including my own I guess, these days I'm a hormonal mess of emotions, sometimes their ridiculously high and happy and I make myself puke, other times their low and angry and everyone else makes me puke. Its crazy I tell you, bipolar even.

I dont want to hear about you love life.

I dont want to be ditched for your love life.

I dont want to hear about my lack of a "love life". I know, more over I dont caaaare. 

I dont want a bloody love life.

You're all in love and happy, good for you, Im happy for you but could you just please keep it to yourselves? Much appreciated. I need to revise, I have exams. No time to dwell on anyones emotional state, much less my own! And this is all just making me dwell... sigh. 

What if?

She smiles at him, it’s a soft shy smile “Where’s your heart boy?”
He lifts an eyebrow and grins “why, you should know.”
She gives him a smile that melts his heart away “I should?”

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He’s five, he’s gazing up at the sky in wonder, what is up there? Does the sky end? He’s five and he wants to know things. He’s five and he wants to know everything.
He’s 30 and still he knows nothing.

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She’s lying on her bed, she is turning 19 soon, she types away on her pink laptop, she likes the pink laptop.
She types and types, and she loves her words, they are a part of her. She writes and writes… until the words lose their meaning and fade away, until she is exhausted by thought and is taken away by sleep into a land of dreams.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There’s a bottle broken on his arm, blood is pouring out, red warm blood pouring down, flowing down his arm in a somewhat soothing way. Tears streaming down his face, he deserves it. He is 17 and he deserves it.
Screaming comes from their room, he knows what will happen next. He tried to stop it… he tried. More screaming, he runs, runs, and runs. Blood stains on his jeans, on his shirt… on his life, his worthless life.

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What if we could see glimpses of others lives? What if we could see how much they suffered, loved, hated, achieved…
What if we could not only see but feel. What if our lives were interwind? What if we were all connected? What if we could share our life?

Maybe then we’d act a little more human. Maybe then we’d understand what it is were meant to do or who were meant to be. Maybe by seeing these little glimpses of reality falling apart or together we’d finally be able to understand our own short comings.
… What if eh?

Oh ho ho hoe.. hoe! Omg! HOE.

- Haha, I was thinking that in my head it sounded funny. HOE. LOL!

- Faaaaaat. FAT. I'm like a big blob of FAT walking around, ew. It makes me feel ugly, me no likey.

- Supernatural has TAKEN over my LIFE. I love dean, dean is awesome. Dean is also a hottie.

- What do I do with you lover boy?

- Lies, lies, liessss... Addictive lies.

- The weather has been lovely, so sunny and beautiful.

- Sleep, food, work, supernatural, food, supernatural, work, supernatural, sleep.

- I dont get you.

- Do I like you? I dont think so.

- Lonely. Im miss lonely. And you cant save me from my loneliness.

- One day, I will be the person I want to be. I wont be lazy, I wont be fat, I will do amazingly well in school, I wont want to be someone else, I wont have ridiculous mood swings, I wont trip on flat surfaces and be laughed at, one day I will be my version of perfect.

- *sigh*

- I still dont get you.

- NO NINE AM LECTURES, REJOICE!

- bye.

Operah debate about Chris and Rihanna.

Really? I mean, REALLY?! As if there arent more important things to debate.

*sigh*
Stupid world.


I've been feeling really down lately, just tired of everything and in need of a break but cant afford it... I dont know whats wrong with me to be honest.

Sure its all rainbows, sunshine and whatever the fuck this happy high has got you on.

What?
WHAT?

Did you have to write it in bold?
Did you have to say it out loud?
Did you have to.. make it real?

Leave me hidding behind the colours of my books and my dreams.

Did you have to write it in bold?
Did you have to say it out loud?
Did you have to... kill my dreams?

"Tell me that you want to dance,
I want to feel your pulse on mine,
You treat me like a stolen glance..
To yourself." ~ The Golden Floor - Snow Patrol

... So, take me to the Golden Floor?